


I Want To Be Your Sledgehammer

by DollyPop



Category: Soul Eater
Genre: Electricity, Electrocution, F/M, Fluff and Humor, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-19
Updated: 2016-09-19
Packaged: 2018-08-15 21:29:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 432
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8073337
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DollyPop/pseuds/DollyPop
Summary: Why don't you call my name?
Or, the fic where Spirit stupidly thinks he's worthy enough to pick up Mjolnir.





	

“Pass me the sledgehammer,” Spirit said, and Stein could feel how offended Marie was through their resonance. He blinked at his friend, and he does use that term loosely, also somewhat offended on his wife’s behalf.

“She isn’t a sledgehammer.”

“Close enough,” Spirit insisted. “Azusa told me there was no way in a thousand years I could wield Marie! I have to show her.”

“There is no way you could wield Marie,” Stein echoed.

“Yeah, that’s what she said! Can you believe-”

“No. The odds of you being able to wield Marie aren’t even high enough for a percentage to be given.”

“Will you stop being a nerd and just pass her here?” Spirit asked.

“Marie,” Stein began calmly, adjusting her in his hold. “Do you want to be passed to Spirit?”

“Absolutely not!” Marie said, and the indignation shuddered through his very bones.

“Well, what did she say?” Spirit asked.

“I’d sooner put Kishin in a blender and eat it with some motor oil, ditt jävla ålahuvud!” Marie said, all but growling.

“She’d prefer you didn’t,” Stein translated, dryly, listening to Marie’s colorful insults with amusement.

“Oh, c’mon! She said yes,” Spirit insisted, “you’re just jealous that she’ll like me more!”

“Senpai-” Stein began, but it was too late. Spirit had already reached for Marie’s weapon form, and it was at that exact moment that an electric current the likes of godly proportions was emitted from Marie and fried Spirit from fingertips to…well…everywhere else. Stein, of course, hadn’t had the time to let go, but due to his resonance with Marie, and his own naturally electric soul, the shock of rejection Marie had given off only ran through him and was amplified, making Spirit give off a humorous chattering sound. 

Scythe-boy finally had enough sense to let go of Marie a few seconds in, when his body recognized the pain, but his hair was frizzed up to kingdom come and he was twitching with the residue of electricity still running through him.

As he fell down, Stein leaned over, looking at Spirit with an eyebrow raised, even as Marie transformed out of weapon form and horrifyingly tried to check him for injuries.

“Oh my god, oh my _god_. I killed him. Franken! Oh god, oh Franken, oh- oh I killed him. I killed him. Oh my god, do something Frank! Is he going to be okay? Talk to me!”

Stein tilted his head, observing the man comically coughing out a puff of smoke. After a beat, he finally answered: “If he succumbs to the electrocution, I volunteer the autopsy.”


End file.
